First Person: Lena “After a few weeks stewing over Catholic guilt, I saw him again. We now meet up most weeks.”
Our latest First Person comes from Lena, am 18 year old woman from London, England, who got over her Catholic guilt to maintain a casual, sexual relationship . If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. We’d love to run it in this blog.
Tell us about yourself:
I’m an 18-year-old university student from London, England.
How do you define virginity?
The first act of vaginal intercourse involving a penis. For some reason, I don’t consider oral sex to be sex (although I actually didn’t partake until after I’d lost my virginity anyway).
Tell us your story:
In my second week of university, I went clubbing with some friends, but I’d accidentally left my ID at home. I farewelled them and went to a bar with some other friends, who were more willing to just go to places I could actually get into. Anyway, we were in this dark, sleazy bar and I was buying a mojito, and all of a sudden I couldn’t see my friends. Then a guy sidled up to me - his name was Alex. I made out with him for most of the night after that, and then he offered to take me back to his place, but I refused. I got his number though.
A couple of days later, he texted me. I was sick of being a virgin, so I agreed to go to his house. I knew what “fooling around” entailed, and he seemed exceptionally keen. So was I. It hurt a bit, but it lasted for a long time and he had endless fun teaching me all sorts of positions. Despite the initial pain and slight ache (I later described intercourse as ”having your insides assaulted with a blunt instrument”), I enjoyed it. It wasn’t special, but it was enjoyable, and I think that was what counted.
After a few weeks stewing over my Catholic guilt, I saw him again. We now meet up most weeks. While occasionally I grapple with the realities of such a casual relationship, I don’t mind, and for the most part it is enjoyable experimentation.
He didn’t tell me his age until afterwards though. He’ll be 26 in July. That did make me feel slightly dirty.